How to Know if a Therapist is the Right Fit
Research shows again and again that the strongest predictor of personal change and success in therapy is a strong therapeutic relationship, characterized by trust, warmth, and safety. How do you know when a therapist is right for you, especially when there’s a sea of qualified professionals on Psychology Today? Here’s a few tips to help you identify a good therapist for you and when it’s the right fit.
The Basics
They accept your insurance. Most providers will have this information on their website, but you may want to call to make sure your plan is accepted.
Their location works for you. You can have the greatest therapist in the world, but if they live too far away for you to realistically commit to weekly therapy, then the endeavor won’t be successful. If you’re looking for in-person therapy, make sure to limit your search to a realistic driving radius from you.
Their qualifications suit your needs. If you’re looking for family therapy, you want a therapist with an LMFT license (Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist). If you’re looking for therapy for your child, you’ll want to make sure the therapist works with kids. Some mental health concerns such as eating and personality disorders usually require a specialized therapist, too. If you generally know what you’re seeking help for, such as anxiety or an eating problem, look for a therapist whose bio mentions having experience treating your condition.
The Details
They make you feel welcome and comfortable. If you’re with a good therapist, you will get a feeling of safety and comfort. You won’t feel like you’re being judged.
You feel a sense of connection. Just like any other relationship, the therapeutic relationship is built on a sense of mutual connection and trust.
They listen and understand. You feel seen and heard, and your therapist listens to you attentively. They may make insightful comments that are more accurate than you can believe!
They work with you collaboratively. A good therapist will ask you questions about what you want out of therapy to help set goals and ultimately, create a treatment plan. If you disagree with or have feedback for your therapist, they take it in stride and adjust their approach accordingly.
The Red Flags
They don’t seem trustworthy. There’s bad apples in every profession, and counseling is no exception. If a therapist isn’t a good match, you won’t feel that sense of comfort and connection. If something doesn’t feel right about your therapist, it’s probably best to trust your gut.
You don’t feel listened to. You might feel judged, uncomfortable, or confused. If this happens, it’s always best to speak up. A good therapist will take the feedback gracefully and use it to adjust their approach, while a bad therapist might insist on the efficacy of their approach or get defensive.
We hope these tips help illustrate what it means to find a good therapist. Remember, you’re not married to the first therapist you see. All therapists know that they won’t be a good fit for a certain percentage of their clients, and will be understanding if you don’t think it’s a match. A good starting place for finding a therapist can be reading bios and seeing if any therapists’ message speaks to you. Looking for your therapist soulmate? Check out the bios of our experienced AWC therapists on the ‘teams’ tab above!
